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Thursday, November 22, 2012

Hardwork and efforts, a life of a medical gal

When i was in high school, i always thought i'm one of the brilliant students. One of a kind. I don't need to study hard to achieve. Everything seems so easy. Everything seems like a perfect life, perfect family, stable financial, good grades, well not really pretty, but i do consider myself as easy on the eyes type, and great friends with an ok social life. I mean it was kind of a great life. I was enrolled in hostel since i was 13 years old, under government scholar school. The school fed us 6 times a day. Hehe
Then, something abruptly happened, i grew up. Maybe because i was dozing off in my daydream, i'm lost to see high school is finally over. I performed well in the national exam with straight A's. My parents were so happy back then. I actually cried 3 days after high school is over because i miss school life. Lame. My mother said, wow, u really loved ur school n friends. Oh well, what to do, I spent 5 years in hostel, rarely went home, that's d only life i knew.
Life became hell the moment I applied for medical course. Everything seems to fall out of places. Let me tell you, i never intended to be a doctor. But if that is my journey, my fate, i'll bear with it. In the medical interview before i was selected, the sponsor of my scholarship ask me why i want to be a doctor. I paused, i did not say i want to help people, i said because i want to join world health organization, so that i can help in war, natural disasters, i want to make a difference. And then i add, when i had enough, then i want to make money. Oh well, that money part pissed off the interviewer. Hey, im being honest. Then he said again, why should we pick u, i said because im unique and im determined.:b
I never thought i'll get it after my interview, but months later, i was called to pre-medical program. I am not happy. I really thought engineering would call first. But because my parents really have high hopes for me, so a doctor it is. Pre-med is my first step toward adult life. Here, i begin to know a lot of people attitude, how to be a hypocrite, how to hide your emotions either in anger, sadness or miserable. Here is where i learn that being smart but lazy does not work.
Being a doctor, u need to be work hard, put efforts, success does not comes rolling. I learnt that the hard way. One year of pre-med, my heart break into pieces so many times. There's time i cried a lot because the pressure is so high in maintaining the grades, the fear that the scholar will be taken from me. Back them i was offered 3 places, russia , indonesia and egypt. I chose indonesia. Do not ask me why, i had my reasons. At first i was promised to go to USU, but then i don't know what happened in the process, my contract was changed to UNHAS, makassar. At that moment, all i think about, damn, where the hell is that?
The first time i touch down on makassar, i remember how i hate being here. I keep getting diarrhea, im sick all the time, my stomach does not agree with the food, in conclude life is hard. Plus i do not have any transport, so must ride pete-pete or ojek. I cried everyday and did i mention to u, it was really hot here? 3 days after being here, i did something out of the blue. My hair at that time is really long. Suddenly i lose my patience, i take a scissor, went in front of the mirror, and i grab my hair and cut it. Like a boy's cut. After that i regret it. Pity my hair.
It took me a solid year to make me accept that i studied in makassar. That long huh. Well alhamdulillah, i make peace with it. At times life here is really hard, but it needs to go on right? Pejam celik pejam celik, its almost been 5 years dah. In a few months, i'll say goodbye to makassar for good. I don't know what to feel now. But all i can say, the bad events i take as an experiences, the happy events i take as a memory. There's a lot of experiences on makassar i do want to share, but i've got to study ortho now. So see u later? Ciao babe.:)
Ps:/ now if i did not study, i find myself stupid and dumb. Oh well, even i stufy, i felt like otak udang saja. Wawawawaaa.:'(