Definitely not my fairytale

Dear diary,

Tomorrow I'm 23. I look back at myself and wondered what I've achieved. nothing? at this age, I'm still penniless, waiting from my father money to support my misery life. I am in misery. Just today, my supervisor rejects my reports.again!god! I'm about a teeny weeny close from crying.
By 23, I dreamt myself of being happy of what I've been doing. But no, I hate the patients who constantly annoys me. I hate the job I've been doing. At this moment I thought a knight in armor suit would have swoop me by now, but No, I feel pathetic. Definitely not my fairytale.
I'm in psychology department now. I'm supposed to be treating the patients but why does I feel that I'm the one that needs medical attentions. Seriously, when your age is increasing, you will feel the peer pressure. Lots of things to think about. It's just not fun anymore. My biological clock is ticking and I cannot do a damn thing about it. About 10 years from now, I still can't even place my future yet.
My parents think I'm destined for greatness, but which parents don't? The real question is, am I? Is being a doctor my calling, if it is, then show me some signs. Up till now I don't feel it. I don't even feel the patients pain. Even in their death, it meant nothing to me. I lost my soul somewhere along the road.
God.what a pity party. I'm really in deep depression. Guess I'll just go through and make the best of it. Maybe 23 is just a number. Well, if it is, why do I worry so much? Is it because my life has go on without according to plan? Yup.my life now is a disaster.
No stability.no plan.no happiness. Great job Ain. Happy sober birthday. Have a blast depressed tonight. Maybe and oh maybe, I just want to be happy. What a damn good price to pay